I owe you guys a way, way better explanation and itís been a long time coming. I'm sorry for being shitty about communication and not updating you guys sooner. What happened completely devastated me, and I wanted nothing to do with this site or the giantess community. I still don't, but I'm well at least enough to write this now.
This site was built out of love. Love for the community, love for our quirky fetish, love for all of you. Weíre an odd happy bunch and a tight knit community that helps us understand ourselves. Itís always been my home. Giantess Love took two entire years of 10+ hours of work every single day. No vacations, no weekends, living below poverty. Pure passion and drive. It simply had to exist. For all of you, all for us.
Then about two months ago, a select group of users pushed through hundreds of stolen credit cards in a coordinated attack. The site wasnít hacked as I initially thought, so no data was compromised. And all credit cards were safe, as credit card data was never stored on the server. The site's security never failed. What did fail was the merchantís stolen credit card protection service. It failed to detect any of the hundreds of stolen cards being pushed by malicious users. Nearly all of them went through. Let this be a warning to all you producers and site owners. Whatever merchant protection you have, double it.
When the chargebacks hit, they bankrupted the site. Completely and utterly bankrupted it. And me, as a result. I put my credit on the line as well, because I believed in this site, in this community, and itís now completely destroyed. I didn't even make rent this month and Iím not owning a house or car for the next decade. No one was more devestated or punished by this than me. So the malicious users got what they wanted. They killed the site. It can no longer survive or pay for its operating costs. And they emotionally and financially devestated the owner.
But the silver lining, if there is one, is that all the content is intact and backed up. Maybe one day the site will rise like a Phoenix if someone else takes over. But honestly, I doubt it, as I can't financially afford to take the time to train someone, and at this point I've started suffering memory issues from the medication I take, and I need to actually be able to afford food first and survive this.
As for why it took me so long to post this: this devastated me. I mean, utterly, completely, emotionally devastated me. This was my lifeís work, the accumulation of 10 years. I dedicated myself to the community, and for the second time in a row, got completely shit on for it and left only with debt. I already suffer from clinical depression and anxiety. This left me looking for rope or a gun. Thankfully I had a best friend to pull me back from that edge. Itís hard to write when you get racing suicidal thoughts at even the mention of a love you poured your heart into. Twice now.
There are so many good people in this community, and people I love and respect and worked so hard to support. You made all of this worth it. Then there are the bad users, and they are more toxic than any community Iíve ever witnessed. They would actually push others to kill themselves if given the chance. I hope as a community, you can come together and remove the toxicity. This community should be about love, about what I saw at Sizecon.
If I could ask one last favor of the good members of this community, please leave me alone to live in peace. Stop with the legal threats and FBI pitchforks. Iím the last person whose life you should be trying to ruin further. Pretty much any giantess fan alive has enjoyed my work at one time or another and it's because I poured my entire heart into it. Because I loved you. I have been the proudest member of this quirky, lovable community and gave so much of my actual, real life to you. Please, I know this is the internet, but please have some kind of sympathy or empathy and don't make my life any more of a living hell that it already is. Please leave me alone to live the rest of my life in poverty and peace.
Thank you. I love you, as I always have. Thanks for being my home.